...nothing

I have 3 job applications pulled up on my computer.
I think that I am obsessed with applying.
Or terrified of not having a job.

Justin and I went to The Cup yesterday after lunch to get some coffee and hot chocolate, and I got to talk to the new manager for a bit.

She told me (as Victor has before), I am always welcome back. Which is comforting to know. :)

I can't wait for people to get back to Atlanta, and back on campus. It is painfully dull here.
Really though.
It is not like an Oglethorpe summer. I like Oglethorpe summers. Just a few select people around. You hang out with people you normally don't because your main group of friends, security blankets, are not around.

And it is lovely. You get closer to people you would never expect and have the time to do so much more.

All that being said, Oglethorpe winter break is not like an Oglethorpe summer.
There is no one here. Offices are closed (except EF), I explored last week when it was so incredibly dull. That was nice. I would like to do that again. Maybe I will. :)

Ahhh, which reminds me! I have not posted about Christmas yet! It was FANTASTIC. Justin's family is absolutely wonderful. We watched "It's a wonderful life" with Justin's dad on Christmas eve, and "Arthur Christmas" with his whole family on Christmas day.
Yall, Justin is Arthur Santa (the main character). Really. This kid can't ride a bike, and is so happy, and haha the interactions with his family is what killed me! He even asked his family to play a board game...which is so Justin. I died!

I also got some of the nicest gifts! I have a purple blanket that I am absolutely in love with and boots! Boots that actually fit me! I have worn them everyday! :D Justin's family seemed to like their gifts from me too, which was very exciting. :)
They were so good to me.

So, that is it. All is good in my life, and if a little boredom is my biggest gripe, then I don't have much to worry about.

AND, as promised, Murder Mystery and Thanksgiving Pictures! :)

Me and Hillary <3 

Tes, and her Turkey. And Hillary, photobomb. 

by two best friends in the entire world. My heart. <3 

My favorite giraffe, Peanut. 

Murder Mystery

Justin, me, and one of the Murder Mystery Actresses

I love this picture! What a fun night!! 

Happy Life.

...entertained

Merry Christmas Eve. 

Just 2 more hours of work and I get to walk to MARTA, head to the airport, try to find Justin's dad and then ride down to Peachtree City to finally get to start my holiday break. 

That will probably be about 7-something-ish. 

I asked Justin if we could make Gingerbread men/houses. He said, "maybe." Which in all honesty, probably means no...but at least we can watch Ms. Marple and that is good enough. 

Plus, I am very excited to spend Christmas with Justin and his family. He makes it sound wonderful, and magical, and like those Christmases you only see on cartoons. 

Anyway, in attempts to entertain myself for the last and next couple hours at work, I will be watching Law and Order. Time is bound to fly by then. :) 

Happy Holidays. 

...reading

almost perfect.
I have a tendency to let things start so well...then fuck them up.

That is where I am at right now.

I feel kinda cold and kinda sad, and really frustrated.


I suppose I could talk about that for a while, but I don't want to. I don't have much else to talk about.
I suppose I could talk about Roman Art, that is what I am supposed to be doing.

Oy vey.

I have 2 options of things to do with my free time. My mom got me J.K Rowling's new book, and I really want to start that...or I can start watching Gossip Girl. (Everyone's statuses have me so curious...and I know I could look up who she is...but I keep telling myself I want to watch it and find out. So that is what I plan to do. Start at Season 1, and make my way through break.)

I think for now I am going to read.

Happy reading.

...done

Tomorrow at midnight. Finals will be done, my family will be gone, people will be leaving campus and I will be here alone with very little to do.

I am still deciding if that is a glorious and wonderful thing, or not.

Right now, I have too much to do. I am exhausted.
I have to write about 1 page of extra credit...and I need to stay up and study. Maybe it is senioritis, maybe it is the realization that I love working and am a little over school, or maybe I am just getting older...but I don't have the stamina for all nighters anymore, not homework all nighters at least.

I fell asleep during my Core 202 final 2 years ago. I guess I don't want that to happen again.
1:30. I HAVE to be asleep by 1:30.

So today was the last day that my parents were here.
I took them to Last Chance shopping, we came out with quite a haul and I am excited to wear some of my new outfits. We also had my mommy's spaghetti for dinner to night at Justin's.
It was fantastic. And my mommy still makes the best spaghetti.

My mom also got me J.K. Rowling's new book for Christmas. Once I get through finals, I get to start it. :)

I am sorry, my brain is a little all over the place and trying to ramble about everything possible other than my extra credit project for management.

Oh, I know something worth while to ramble about...my job interview. I had that this morning.
(Big thanks to Justin and Viggy for wishing me luck this morning. :) Aren't they fanastic?)
I think the interview went well, but I don't know if the company is a good fit for me. Honestly, I never thought I would say this, but if they offered me a job...I would turn it down. I would take the opportunity to find the perfect fit over the security. It is only December, right? I have the time and flexibility to do that?

Anyway, I have talked about nearly nothing long enough...and before my eyes get too heavy, I need to write up this extra credit and go to bed.

For now, some pictures to make my blog beautiful:

I think I love ballerina's more than I should. 

Happy--DONEWITHFINALS-eve. 

...watching more.

I am not meant to follow tv shows.
I just finished watching the last season of Medium.
Charlotte and I used to watch that show together, regardless of other people's opinion, I love it.

But seriously. Of course I cried.
(Side note: I was not a huge fan of how it all ended, but the beginning of the last episode really got me...)
Anyway, now I feel uncomfortable, have a knot in my stomach, and a little at a loss at what to do.
I feel this way when I finish a book series I am really wrapped up in.
I cried in Justin's car on the way to the last Harry Potter movie.

This is my life you guys.
I think that is why I don't follow tv series, or read a lot of extended books. Too many emotions. Really though.

It is like a less intense version of how I feel when I think of never seeing someone I know again. It is not as bad, because, I don't actually know these people...but in someways it is worse, because I can't just check in on them on Facebook, AND I know these people are not real, so their lives are not just going on somewhere else...their existence ended with those closing credits.

My brain has all the thoughts and all the feelings about this.
haha. Do other people have this experience? Or am I just easily attached?
For Christ's sake, I cried when Dill got lost in the Rugrats Movie.
Maybe it is just me. haha.

Now I feel all strange.
And people don't look too kindly on you calling them at 2:30 in the morning to tell them that you now have a hole in your heart and your thoughts are all over the place and you feel a little at a loss as to what to do. Haha, I think if I called and told Justin or Tes I needed them to console me over a TV show, they would tease me about it forever.

Anyway, in other more relevant news...MY FAMILY IS COMING TOMORROW!!! :)

I am so excited. I regret not getting more done on my final though, because it means I have that to deal with, in addition to my interview while they are here.

It will all get done though.
In the mean time, tomorrow is Christmas, and tomorrow I get my mom's spaghetti, and really, it does not get much better than my mommy's spaghetti. :)

Happy Christmas Eve.

...in May (EDIT)

Got a call back.

It seems that they were very interested, but I am unfortunatly graduating in May, which is too late.

Disappointed because it was so perfect. Disappointed because I would much rather be working than in classes. Disappointed because it may just be a little to early. I really felt like I was the right person at the wrong time.

It is ok though. Because I am still excited. I am excited that I qualified! I am excited because they were really interested and the biggest downfall was time, and time is something I have no control over. I am excited because I may actually get into my field after all.

Oh, and I have my first final today.
hooray.

At least Justin will get home today.

Happy Finals.

EDIT:

So after I talked with her this morning, I talked to Justin. He suggested I send a follow up email. So I did, telling her I was still interested, so if there was an opening in May or if they had the flexibility to take someone part time until then, to let me know.

She emailed back, told me she would pitch the idea to her boss.
He liked it, and I officially have an interview Monday morning at 9:30!!!

I am over the moon right now.
Today can't get much better.

HAPPY DAY

...decorating

No post for weeks, and then 2 in one day...is that allowed?

I think it is all the alone time lately. Or the fact that I am feeling a little anxious and trying to blog my way out of it.
In the last 2 hours, I have dyed my hair, started cleaning, got distracted, rearranged some things, and put up my little Christmas tree.

No lights and only one ornament, but my family will be here Sunday, and we will decorate the tree with some family favorites and have our Christmas. :) 

I am so excited. 

Christmas always makes me feel cozy and warm, and few things are happier than a decorated tree and some stockings. Even our house looked beautiful at Christmas time. With our dinky little tree, and stocking hung by the tv (with care...haha I could not help myself).

The family tree last year. 

I remember one year Pachan and I decorated the whole house. 

We had some lights outside...I think it looked more like a luau than Christmas, but whatever. 

We also hung some garland above the windows, it was super cute. 

One of my favorite things about Christmas is seeing how people decorate their houses. I love when you can see someone's tree through a window from the street. I love looking at everyone's ornaments and hearing the stories behind them. I really love when people set up those little Christmas towns, you know with the tiny houses and shops. Charlotte's mom still has the biggest one I have ever seen. It is the classiest decoration to me, and the most fun! 

Every year it gets to be different, a new town with new tiny houses. 

I can't wait until I am older and have tiny houses of my own to rearrange on white sheets, meant to be snow. It will always make me think of the Christmases where half the day was spent at Charlotte and Katie's houses. <3 

Anyway, I have done far to little work this Dead Day, and I probably should remedy that...or at least clean a few more rooms. Most likely I will end up straightening my hair.

I feel considerable less anxious, but I do have a few nerves still unaccounted for. 

Happy Holiday. 

...applying

I am applying for a job. A real job, a grown up job.

I have never applied for a grown up job before. I can hardly believe that this is the point I am at in my life.
When did I grow the hell up?

The other day, I was at Justin's house and he told me that after I graduated, if I needed to stay with him while I got on my feet, I could. It was such a comforting thing to know...that I could have a place to go while I could get my life together. Since I let him live with my for a few months, I would not feel like it was some huge favor...I mean it would be, but I could honestly feel good knowing I could do the same.

Anyway. I am looking at the job description and seriously, it seems like the position was made for my experiences. Really though, it is like I had the position description in front of me and just planned my work and internship experiences according to this job.

I have a resume already drawn up, but I am too nervous to send it.

I feel like I need the Justin and Tes seals of approval first.
Problem is, Tes has no phone, Justin is busy working in Boston.

All they want is my resume, not a cover letter or anything. I mean my resume is pretty encompassing  but it does not include the experience I will gain next semester which would satisfy a few requirements I do not have experience for yet...but would have when I start working.
It is hard to rely on a one page document to sell yourself. I know I hate cover letters, but by not needing one, I am seeing the value in it...also, not needing one means I have nothing I can work on before I can finally figure out how or when I can get a hold of Tes or Peanut.

Even if they tell me not to change a thing on my application...I still need them to be excited and nervous with me.

Chances are, this will not be the last full-time job I apply for, but it is the first...and that is kind of a big deal.

Happy Grown-up days.

...witnessing a murder

I have been meaning to post about my life for a long time. 

I mean, I have posted some blogs, but they did not end up on facebook. They were mine I guess. 

Have I ever posted about the basement theatre? I certainly hope so, because it has become mine and Tes's senior year place. From the Farmer' Market, to Zen Tea, to the Basement...we really have stumbled upon the best kept secrets of Atlanta. 

We went to 3 improv shows this weekend. I also went to 2 murder mystery parties. 1 with Justin, 1 with Tes...

Thursday. I had been waiting patiently for Thursday ALL week. See forever and ever ago, Justin and I got a coupon to a murder mystery dinner...with Ms. Marple being one of the favorite and few things we agree to watch, it seemed like the perfect outing. Also, since he moved out last week, I have missed my constant interactions and regular cuddles with Peanut. It was so fun! We dressed up, and looked PRECIOUS! He has a bunch of pictures, but who knows when they will be posted. 

I poofed my hair all 50's style, he looked like a greaser. 

Peanut, as "Slick Cool" the coolest kid in school...and son of the MURDERER. 

Me, I promise there is a pic of my hair all poofed. 

Anyway, it was so much fun and we have tickets to another in February! 

Friday night I did the annual Ogle-family Christmas party....it was not what it has been in years past, but It was perfect none the less. After the party, Tes and I were figuring out what to do...of course we decided on Improv. BEST show yet. If you have never been to The Basement, go. It is $5 for students, and they have a mean selection of drinks. 

While we were figuring out what do to, we found some Murder Mystery tickets for 75% off for Saturday, so we scooped them up. 

Yesterday I got to work on a Music video for EF and have wife time. After, Tes and I went to a fantastic, very interactive Murder Mystery party. It was not a dinner like the one Justin and I went to and there were no costumes, but it was more interactive.

We guessed wrong at both events though. haha! XD 

Last night we went back to The Basement, except as an APO fellowship event. It was fantastic! The cast is starting to recognize us, and of course I made an ass of myself showing too much cleavage, and inconveniently standing in front of a camera! 

Me and Great-grand-little. Stole this from Betsy. 

Oh and I got offered an internship on Thursday! 

Sorry this is not particularly well written and a little all over the place. 

APO elections are today and I am in a rush for time. 

LFS

Janet 

...wrapped in grey blanket

Trying to be a grown up, and not miss someone I see everyday. 

I don't know if it is the stress of finals, my over attachment, or the fact that I am cold right now. 

but what ever. 

Justin got an apartment and moved into it this week. Meaning, I lost bestfriendroommate. It is cool, just boring. I have gotten so used to be around someone, even if it is not the same person...pretty much 24 hours a day. I may get 5ish hours to myself a week...I have grown to like that. I like people, most all the time, so having all this alone time is strange. I am filling it with sleep...but more than that, watching every episode of Medium ever. And Tes and Hillary time. A lot of that. <3 

You know who I can't wait to miss? Peter Drucker and my Management class. Good riddance. 

Besides, 3 pages is nothing really. In the grand scheme of things. When you consider all the pages I have written in my time. 

I wish I could blog for a living, I mean, some people do. 

Until then, Pandora is assuming what I want to listen to...and so far it has been pretty on point. 

Did I ever mention that I am planning to go vegetarian? Once I can afford my own food, and my body can afford making the transition. That is the plan right now. 

Did you know I have no scars? I take that back. I have one. I walked into a wall in the 1st grade. You would think single file lines would prevent that...if the kid in front of you manages to not pummel face first into the oversize concrete bricks, you won't either...nope. When the kid in front of you has the latest and greatest technology in kids' fashion aka light up shoes, even single file cant protect you from your 5 stitches becoming the hot topic of the class that week. 

I don't really have emotional scars either. I have never wanted to kill myself, or even been depressed. Justin thinks I may have been a little depressed fall last year, and maybe. Mostly I just felt anxious and a bit out of my head. But it was nothing that a little OU Counseling Center could not fix. 

When Justin and I first became friends, he said he loved my emotional stability. I was the most sane person he knew. 

I would not trade it for anything. However, sometimes knowing that I am so normal makes me feel all the more crazy. It makes me feel like I do not deserve to stress out, obsess, or feel overwhelmed. In the grand scheme of things, I can leave my problems at home, abandon them. Let them become soiled, unrecognizable. If I can't distinguish them as my problems, I can ignore that underneath the mold and grime, it was mine. 

I love when my blogs make no sense. I mean, I understand them, I suppose that is why it is my blog. 

In solid, more comprehensive words, Justin and I are going to murder mystery tomorrow. I am so excited. I have my outfit all planned out. :D 50's theme. 

I can't wait for my fuzzy grey security blanket. I need a good nights sleep after a late night of paper writing. 

 Happy Finals.